Mate, every college has a free counseller.
I went to counselling when I was in college (cos I was having panic attacks) - it didnt give me any epiphany, but it did help.
I can tell you already... a counseller wont give you any answers, or even try to explain things for you (whether you alreadk know or not) - they will simply sit and listen and mildly support what you are saying and encourage you to open up.
It really can help just to sit there and talk to someone who wont offer any judgement.
Perhaps medication would help, I have no clue... but I think the fact you are coming here to say these things means you feel yourself you want to talk about it, to clear the air of your mind... and a counseller is simply a person to do that to in "real life" rather than the net.
You know that following that girl home would have been a bad choice and you didnt do it, thats the difference between having a problem and being crazy (and you probably do have a problem and you probably arent crazy)
Whatever you do, I'd think about the counselling, but you need to address these feelinds somehow buddy. Good luck with it. And you are right not to do steroids. Regardless of making you angry or not, they will give you acne and a heart attack in your late 30's - and who needs that?
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"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."
The Gospel of Thomas
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