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Originally Posted by TotalMILF
Porn is great! I find myself looking at a lot of porn lately, due to my husband being stationed overseas the the obvious lack of sex that goes along with deployment. It doesn't mean that I don't love him, or that I don't want to be with him, or that I don't find him sexually attractive (I do, holy SHIT I do!). It just means that I'm horny and I want to get off. I have some videos and picture of him that I often use, too 
This is a generalization, but most males have a markedly higher sex drive than most women. They think about it ALL THE TIME. When you shot your bf down for the horizontal mambo, what did you think he was going to do? Go out and make you breakfast in bed? Ha! Maybe AFTER getting off! If I caught my hubby masturbating I'd probably get involved, or at least provide some visual stimulation of my own to assist him if I wasn't "in the mood" myself.
My point is, the fact that he's looking at porn likely has NOTHING to do with not desiring/loving you. He just wants to get off 'cause it feels fucking good. What's wrong with that? If it's really bugging you, talk to him about it. Maybe make some porn of your own for him to "use" at a later date |
I love you.....
You completely understand the issue.
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Originally Posted by abaya
Well hey now, I don't know about you, but I objectify my husband frequently and he likes it. |
LOL, exactly.
Most males could care less and are game for just about anything in the bedroom. Personally, I find it hard to find a sexually creative woman.
To the original poster:
A couple of comments.
1. You definitely have some very obvious notions about porn. Without you directly saying it, I hazard to guess that you don't like it. My guess is that your first BF you described knew this and probably sensed that your stace on it was quite strong (Most teenagers are very extreme) and he looked at it purely objectively. She doesn't like porn and has made that very clear in no uncertain terms, so, it's not worth the arguement and the potential of not getting her and therefore, I am simply going to tell her a white lie - what she wants to hear. That way, I can have my cake and eat it too. I'll have my secret porn stash, AND, I can end up in her bed to boot.
Smart man. Only problem was he got busted. But most men are into porn.
2. Your current BF- He's up front about his stash. He probably also knows you have at least reservations about porn (you're not a teenager anymore, so the black and white teenage attitudes have faded slightly, ohly slightly, to grey) but he doesn't care. That's your problem as far as he is concerned.
When you rejected his sexual advance, he figured, ok, I'm going to take matters into my own hands and get myself off because I can't think straight and I need to cum. Men are very simple that way. If I was with a woman and too tired to fuck and she was wanting it - I'd hand her her vibrator and spoon her while she came. I wouldn't give it a second thought.
I think there may be more to this story however. I am wondering if your current guy isn't sending you a bit of a message. Perhaps you have rejected his sexual advances once too often. Once in a while is normal (Though I have been with women who NEVER EVER said no), however, if you are saying no too often, not only is he getting himself off, but, he's using porn cause he knows that deep down, you don't like porn. He's sending you a message that he's not happy with your refuaal to take care of him.
I've been with women in bed where she's not able to service me, and I take matters into my own hands. But I have never gotten out of bed and hopped onto a computer to do it alone. Usually, I just ask her to hold my balls while I take matters into my own hands. I cum, and she gets the peace and quiet she wanted, I'm calmed down, and it's still quite erotic and loving. Usually, I am already sporting wood just laying in bed beside her. I don't need to get up and turn on a computer to wank to in another room while you are alone.
Nope, he's telling you he's not happy. He got out of your bed, left you alone, looked at other women, and climaxed and made sure you knew it.
(Note, this all is strictly my opinion as I don't know the guy, or you, and I am justing saying from my perspective, as if it was me.) Nobody likes rejection.