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Old 05-31-2007, 11:27 AM   #3 (permalink)
Jinn
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Location: Seattle, WA
Quote:
they are the gravitational center to orbiting drama.
Bahah. That's awesome. I'd never heard this expression before, and I'm definitely going to steal it.

Your dilemma seems explainable in two different ways. The primary explanation is your age group. Every decade of our lives is easily measured by the "stickyness" (for lack of a better word) of friends. 1-10 and 10-19 are relatively sticky, with the majority of your friends seeing you every day, as you live in close proximity and attend the same elementary, middle, and high schools. Even people who move around a lot in their childhood have pretty sticky friends at their new schools.

The twenties, unfortunately, are notorious for a "flow" of friends. People are taking the time to become who they want to be, including dramatic changes in attitudes and opinions. This alone can splinter friends and disconnect them, and it's only compounded by the fact that people are very mobile in this time period. They're moving to other states to attend college, leaving those states after graduation, pairing up with members of the opposite (or same) sex and isolating themselves from friends while developing relationships, or just taking time to be "independent."

I've had twenty to fifty friends come and go in the last year, and I imagine it'll only get worse as I seperate from the college age individuals.

It isn't until the thirties that people start to develop "sticky" friends again. You're settling into careers and long term relationships, so your friends are likely fellow employees or friends of those who you are in relationships with.

By now people are done moving around so much and have slowed down in dating, so they're much more sticky and more convenient to talk to.

I suppose the short answer is just that you have to wait for that time to come.

The OTHER explanation that I would offer is that you're a unique breed of woman. You're right that most of the women in this generation are annoying carbon copies who look alike, talk alike, and think the same stupid shit. The ones who care about things interesting to me are rare, but a brief e-spying at your profile tells me that you and my girlfriend would be good friends. She complains of the same qualities.. that most women she knows wouldn't be particularly good friends, becuase they're so lacking in desire, interest, education, compassion or .. well.. really anything important.

It's a generational phenomenon as well as a factor of being a unique woman. Be proud of it. :-D
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