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Old 05-21-2007, 07:49 AM   #31 (permalink)
mandy
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Location: Port Elizabeth, South Africa
first loves huh...

well, I've had many boyfriends a few of them whom i thought i loved or rather was in love with. but none such a feeling had i experienced than in my first year of tech (college).

a lot of the "bf's" i had, although i doubt you could call them that because i never really brought them home to meet the parents, and because they rarely lasted over 6 months...except this one guy in primary school...i "went out" with him for over a year until i got to high school :-)

but yeah, the first year i started studying...

i can't really even begin to describe this feeling...and i knew that it was love,or rather that i was in love because it was a feeling that i had never felt before...it took me completely by surprise. and i knew that it was different to the rest because none of the others made me feel that way.

I missed him when he wasn't around and when he was there i could never let him go. My body tingled every time he touched my hand. My heart pumped lumps of chocolate custard every time i saw him in the cafeteria. My body ached to feel him and my heart yearned to see him all the time.

he was the dream i dreamed when i did not know who he was and the hope i clung to until i finally found him.

even when he'd make me angry, even when he'd make me sad, even when all i wanted to do is throttle him so bad that he couldn't really breathe...i loved him more and more...

because someone you did not care about and did not love as much as i loved him would not have made me feel as angry and frustrated and sad as he sometimes did.

but we always come out on top...and i guess you can say i've been feeling this for the past four and a half years now. healer and i have been together for four of them.

it's been a road of really shitty bumps in them and still sometimes we get the odd bump every coupla kilometers...but i know that one day, there's a smooth newly tared road just waiting to be traveled by us.

healer is now and will always be the only love of my life.
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