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analog · 05-03-2007, 02:47 AM

I was 20, she was 17. I met her in person for the first time when she came with her mom to pick me up at the airport. We'd met over the internet and been friends for years before... and had only just a year prior, when she was 16 and I 19, become anything more than friends.

I still vividly remember the smile on her face when she saw me walk through the gate (back when people could pick you up at the gate)... she lit up so much that if all the lights were suddenly snuffed out, I'd still be able to see her. Her smile was contagious, and she ran to me and threw her arms around me...

There's a point when you're hugging someone long enough that it can transition from a hug into a more personal, "holding each other". I think we only "hugged" for about 2 seconds, tops... and we both felt so instantly connected and "at home" with one another, that we both just relaxed instantly, and just stood there holding each other for a minute, whispering hellos and "nice to finally meet you"s through her tears and my smile.

I was with her for three and a half years, 3 full years of which were spent long-distance (about 1200 miles). After she moved here, we slowly discovered that we had incompatibilities with living together... but more importantly, we'd "grown apart". Though the love and connection was always there, we'd grown differently as people, and had different thoughts and priorities on things.

She was my second girlfriend, and the second girl I had sex with, but she was my first love, and I also think my deepest love to this day.

We've pretty much lost all communication with each other, but I think that was sort of engineered by both of us without either of us saying anything. It kept hurting us to be close, friends, to talk and chat and feel how we felt but know that being together just didn't work. And you'd think that seeing her happy with another guy would be the worst part- far from it. Knowing she was with someone who was making her happy made me happy for her. It was when she was single, and we'd chat, that I'd really miss her the worst.

But hey, after her I met another wonderful woman who I loved a lot and was with for almost a year and a half. She's the one major regret I have... though I'm sure things would still be the way they are, I feel like there were things I could have looked past (her complete lack of ambition/drive) if I'd tried harder to look past them.

But we are who we are, and I'll find someone new soon enough.

05-03-2007, 02:47 AM	#24 (permalink)
analog Banned	I was 20, she was 17. I met her in person for the first time when she came with her mom to pick me up at the airport. We'd met over the internet and been friends for years before... and had only just a year prior, when she was 16 and I 19, become anything more than friends. I still vividly remember the smile on her face when she saw me walk through the gate (back when people could pick you up at the gate)... she lit up so much that if all the lights were suddenly snuffed out, I'd still be able to see her. Her smile was contagious, and she ran to me and threw her arms around me... There's a point when you're hugging someone long enough that it can transition from a hug into a more personal, "holding each other". I think we only "hugged" for about 2 seconds, tops... and we both felt so instantly connected and "at home" with one another, that we both just relaxed instantly, and just stood there holding each other for a minute, whispering hellos and "nice to finally meet you"s through her tears and my smile. I was with her for three and a half years, 3 full years of which were spent long-distance (about 1200 miles). After she moved here, we slowly discovered that we had incompatibilities with living together... but more importantly, we'd "grown apart". Though the love and connection was always there, we'd grown differently as people, and had different thoughts and priorities on things. She was my second girlfriend, and the second girl I had sex with, but she was my first love, and I also think my deepest love to this day. We've pretty much lost all communication with each other, but I think that was sort of engineered by both of us without either of us saying anything. It kept hurting us to be close, friends, to talk and chat and feel how we felt but know that being together just didn't work. And you'd think that seeing her happy with another guy would be the worst part- far from it. Knowing she was with someone who was making her happy made me happy for her. It was when she was single, and we'd chat, that I'd really miss her the worst. But hey, after her I met another wonderful woman who I loved a lot and was with for almost a year and a half. She's the one major regret I have... though I'm sure things would still be the way they are, I feel like there were things I could have looked past (her complete lack of ambition/drive) if I'd tried harder to look past them. But we are who we are, and I'll find someone new soon enough.