Just a warning from a father with 2 small ones - they may seem like a way to hold a relationship together, but you might find once the baby has arrived that it is just an excuse to stay together. Babies are hard work for both the stay at home carer and the money earner, and if you guys are not fully happy being together then a new baby that is cutting into your sleeping time is not really going to help.
Having children has probably caused more tension in our relationship than any other single factor. Once the child has arrived make sure that you still:
- each have child free time, without each other (i.e. one looks after the baby while the other goes out to do stuff)
- you take advantage of others so that you can get out together without the baby
- you both carry the burden of getting out of bed in the middle of the night and doing baby stuff
You, at least, have to raise the issues that concern you, even if they are not resolved face to face. The do need resolution and if either party won't come to the party, then you most likely have an unhappy future together. Please don't think that you must stay together for the child's sake. You are better off ending your relationship when you are still civil with one another, if it means both of you have a good relationship with the child - otherwise they become a pawn in your later breakup (if/when it occurs).