Go see your GP and see what he says. It sounds like your trying to keep everything secret, even just talking with the Doc may take a lump off your mind.
Ask him if he can recommend a therapist or psychiatrist to help. If your find yourself someone to see, and your insurance covers it, then that is going to take a bigger lump of your wifes mind than just turning around and saying 'i need help'. Besides, she's your wife, you gonna have to open up eventually, they are psychic in case you didn't realise!
