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horsehead · 03-09-2007, 12:40 PM

I’m not able to offer any advice, sorry, but it seem that I am in a similar situation with my gf, so I am very interested in the advice that you may get on this topic.
My gf & I were outrageously sexual beings when we first met and continued on with our varied forms of sex for years.
Unfortunately, a couple years ago, I had two consecutive back & neck injuries that put a kibosh on things for a while. I was on plenty of pain meds and when I wasn’t, I was in constant pain… Not to mention the lack of physical activity.
In that time, I was angry and bitter at the loss of many aspects of my abilities and I know I was not easy to live with, to put it mildly. Not having the strength to be able to hold myself up during sex, or maintain an erection due to the pain, or because I was too doped up was humiliating.
What made it even tougher was the fact that, as adventurous as she is about sex, my gf is not that active in the role of aggressor. (i.e. does not take the initiative to get on top or take control of the session) She is a queen and is used to me doing all of the work and I love going down on her, but I haven’t even been allowed to go that route in quite a while.
As far as my frustrations towards my disability, I tried to be aware of my anger and to curtail it away from my gf, who was kind, supportive and loving throughout all of my convalescence, but there were things I had said and done under duress that have really impacted our relationship on a lot of levels and has had a major impact on our sex life.
On top of that, the few times that we had sex while I was still racked up, there was one occasion that I accidentally hurt her during anal. This, I think, has been a terrible blow towards her trust in me and has been monument to putting her off of sex.
After the physical therapy, I have been getting stronger and have been getting back to my regular weight training and so I have been trying to initiate sessions again, but I don’t get a positive reciprocation.
Because of the injuries, I had lost my job and getting back into the industry on my own has been a bear. There has been a lot of financial stress lately and we both have been working many hours, but I still feel for her sexually, hell, I fantasize about having sex with her.
We are still very affectionate, but not passionate. She lacks any interest in having sex anymore no matter what approach I try to take. She mentions it rarely, but it never happens.

Not to overload on your question; but again, I am very interested in the responses you get.

03-09-2007, 12:40 PM	#4 (permalink)
horsehead Upright	I’m not able to offer any advice, sorry, but it seem that I am in a similar situation with my gf, so I am very interested in the advice that you may get on this topic. My gf & I were outrageously sexual beings when we first met and continued on with our varied forms of sex for years. Unfortunately, a couple years ago, I had two consecutive back & neck injuries that put a kibosh on things for a while. I was on plenty of pain meds and when I wasn’t, I was in constant pain… Not to mention the lack of physical activity. In that time, I was angry and bitter at the loss of many aspects of my abilities and I know I was not easy to live with, to put it mildly. Not having the strength to be able to hold myself up during sex, or maintain an erection due to the pain, or because I was too doped up was humiliating. What made it even tougher was the fact that, as adventurous as she is about sex, my gf is not that active in the role of aggressor. (i.e. does not take the initiative to get on top or take control of the session) She is a queen and is used to me doing all of the work and I love going down on her, but I haven’t even been allowed to go that route in quite a while. As far as my frustrations towards my disability, I tried to be aware of my anger and to curtail it away from my gf, who was kind, supportive and loving throughout all of my convalescence, but there were things I had said and done under duress that have really impacted our relationship on a lot of levels and has had a major impact on our sex life. On top of that, the few times that we had sex while I was still racked up, there was one occasion that I accidentally hurt her during anal. This, I think, has been a terrible blow towards her trust in me and has been monument to putting her off of sex. After the physical therapy, I have been getting stronger and have been getting back to my regular weight training and so I have been trying to initiate sessions again, but I don’t get a positive reciprocation. Because of the injuries, I had lost my job and getting back into the industry on my own has been a bear. There has been a lot of financial stress lately and we both have been working many hours, but I still feel for her sexually, hell, I fantasize about having sex with her. We are still very affectionate, but not passionate. She lacks any interest in having sex anymore no matter what approach I try to take. She mentions it rarely, but it never happens. Not to overload on your question; but again, I am very interested in the responses you get.