She still likes her ex as much as she likes you, you have to realize this. Jinn is right, the ex boyfriend is doing nothing different than you are. Realize this, you two
are broken up right now. I know she came back to you wanting to get back together, which is exactly what she did with the other ex when you two broke up.
Don't hate the other ex-, he's playing the same game you are. You have to get her to understand that for you and her to get along she needs to see only you. She is confused right now, and confused people can justify stupid stupid things.
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"Why cant you just not reply to his texts or messages on facebook for a while until he gets bored or gets the idea into his thick skull that you dont want to be with him?"
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Answer: She still likes him, and while she doesn't want to be with him she still thinks about him and still most definately wants his penis.
Simply tell her that you find what she is doing is unacceptable, and to change or you're through. I'm pretty certain she'll choose the latter, but it's the only way for you two. She'll come back every once in a while, after she re-realized why she broke up with her other ex. This will be your second chance to lay down what is acceptable, and her second time accept or leave.