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Originally Posted by Ddd3
and I feel bad because my boyfriend is so determinded and all I do is dissapoint him on every idea he gets... Does anyone have ANY advice? cause I'm running out of ideas and so is he and I really want to orgasm for him the next time he's home from the marines... (that's in 18 days)
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I see a problem right here... you want to orgasm for HIM, not yourself. It sounds like he's putting a lot of pressure on you to come, or you are putting it on yourself... but neither is going to help you, mentally. And a ton of it is mental. Personally, I don't come from vaginal alone, and very rarely from anything other than oral stimulation. My husband and I are pretty used to the fact that I won't come with his penis inside me, and it doesn't bother us terribly. You have to take the pressure off yourself, and have that orgasm for YOU and no one else.
Also, in terms of taking time... probably the biggest reason I started being able to come with my husband was that he JUST NEVER STOPPED. No, I mean really, he would be down with his head between my legs for probably close to an hour at first... I kept feeling bad that it was taking so long, but he just kept shaking his head and kept going. I learned that he really, really, really wanted me to come, and he wouldn't give up no matter how tired his tongue got... even after 45 minutes. And it was wonderful. It took the pressure off, and I was able to learn how to come easier and faster over time.
Finally, I don't know how much this applies to anyone else, but for me it's very difficult to come if I can't hold on to something. I mean, the bedframe is ideal, but also the mattress or something (behind my head). I have to be able to create tension in my abdominal area by "pulling" myself up somehow, and that makes me able to come MUCH faster than if I was just lying there taking it. But I was always the girl who got horny by climbing the rope in jr. high, so maybe it's just me.
