Quote:
|
Originally Posted by suncrafter
"Dear Orcs, I'm a 16 year old human male and I'm scared. I am scared because I'm afraid that I might be gay. I like some of my friends who are boys and that bothers me a LOT. I WANT to like girls. But I have feelings for some of my friends who are boys and not for any of my friends that are girls. (Like that deep feeling in our stomach kind of feeling.) I find myself being sad a lot... Not just because I'm scared that I like boys, but also that I can't be with any of them. I'm sure it sounds weird but I'm scared and it makes me cry. I don't know what to do about these feelings. I don't wanna sound wimpy, because I'm not, but this is the only thing that's ever made me this upset. There is one friend in particular that I like and I don't know if I should talk to him or get to know him better because I've only known him a short while. Should I tell him how I feel? If so, how? Thank you and sorry if I was rambling."
- "Scared"
|
Scared,
I think we should first delve into why you are afraid. Many people who are coming to the realization that they may be bisexual or homosexual fear what society might think of them. While there are some backwards people who might mistreat someone for being gay, there are also people out there that would mistreat someone because they have freckles or a lisp. Would it be better to avoid being yourself and maybe avoiding some lashings or would it be better to be yourself? I ask honestly, because it's possible you are quite litterally surrounded by people who may not understand that your continuing realization of a truth about yourself is a very healthy development. It's possible those around you could judge you harshly, and it's possible that they may accept you. That's not for me to say. What I can say is that your best bet is to weight the pros and cons. Some men and women who discover early on that they are homosexual choose to hide it until they leave home or even to their death beds, though I'd hardly advocate the latter.
It's time for you to spend some time figuring out who you are. Take time to figure out who you are attracted to. You may be bisexual or gay, but it's really up to you to make the determination based on your feelings. I would refrain from dating until you're sure, as it woulnd't be fair to start a relationship without knowing whether you were really interested or not. If you de feel the strong need to start a relationship, be as honest as possible. Explain where you are right now and what that could mean.
If you're not sure with whom you might speak of this, you may want to consider speaking to a professional.
Best of luck, and I hope for the best outcome.