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what kind of time frame are you dealing with? given the hyper stress that seems to accompany these situations - any chance of getting into couples counseling, or just single counseling for yourself - some place you can discuss these issues in a fairly neutral environment? did these emotions you're dealing with start up only after y'all were engaged and the plans started to be made? it sounds to me like y'all have some serious co-dependency issues, and if nothing else she has some issues she should work out - regardless of your impending marital status. if you're just now vocalizing these emotions - that can be a pretty powerful period...you might give yourself time to inspect these feelings and try to get to the root of them.
if you're pretty clear in your head that you're not in love with her, and its a problem with her fundamental personality and/or your fundamental relationship, etc - then the best thing you can do is start getting out now. part of that is going to be talking about it with her, her family - whatever...but remember not to go in attacking. only makes it worse.
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You don't love me, you just love my piggy style
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