This is definitely a topic that's been discussed at legnth in the BDSM community. My personal opnion is that in a truly equal BDSM relationship, both parties are equally giving and taking- giving what the other person wants, taking what they want, but all in the context of love and respect.
An article I found helpful in this context is
Advice to a Novice Dominant from sexuality.org . I thought it explained the correct mindset that a dominant should have when approaching a new interaction. While my husband and I don't follow a BDSM relationship de rigeur, I try to be as submissive as possibe and he is working on becoming more and more "Alpha Male" type dominant.
I think also you have to ask yourself what your definition of "take" is. Are you taking something because you want it for yourself and your own fufillment, or are you taking something because it leads to a desirable outcome?
Ultimately, when exploring BDSM you have to forge the relationship, as well as the definition of give and take, with your partner and no one else. Because BDSM can be such a highly emotional investment with your partner, communication and understanding of the guidelines and expectations is the most important thing you can do with your partner.