Photosoul, I sincerely hope things work out for you. I'm glad to hear you are going to counseling for help.
I see more than a bit of myself in this type of situation. Like Uptown posted:
Quote:
I dislike having every word/action/facial expression or voice tone/inflection examined under a magnifying glass and totally hate very small/minor issues being discussed to death, when these things happen it just makes me wish to actively shrink from the person doing it.
*snip*
"We need to talk" is a phrase that some women cringe from too, save this only for bigger issues, for small things, short, sweet and to the point is far better!
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emphasis mine.
I know I tend to react this way under strong pressure. Part of it is a self-control issue. It's a way I can exhibit to myself and to others that they are not in control of the situation--I am. You can't argue with a person who won't talk back to you
Unfortunately, you can still be yelled at.
Another part of it is feeling like no matter what you say short of an immediate, abject, 'prostrating yourself on the ground' apology every time, it's not going to satisfiy the other party. Which I can't help but see as a form of control--someone stomps their foot, imagines some slight, and it has to turn into a freaking drama-queen emotional bitch-slapping show before I can go on with my day, if there's any left afterwards.
