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Originally Posted by longbough
Actually there's a psychological personality type called, schitzotypia. It doesn't classify as a disorder (e.g. schitzophrenia or bipolar disorder) but schitzotypal persons tend to stay indoors, have little or no sex drive, and are completely devoid of any desire to have social interaction. He lives in an apartment and never dates ... but he's not lonely. He just doesn't feel any desire for relationships. And he says he's perfectly happy.
Believe it or not, there are some folks (even some psychologists) who consider this a disorder and believe schitzotypals require therapy and/or meds to help them socialize. I think that's wrong. If the guy is happy what's the point? If the guy isn't happy then, by definition, he's not schitzotypal but agorophobic and xenophobic.
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i almost fit in this category. it's been years since i got laid, and it's not from lack of oppurnity. im pretty damn good lookin and extremely socially adept... im one of those people that get life stories from strangers on a plane because they are automatically comfortable with me. I go out, but it's more like im brought out because my friends want me to go with them than it is my idea.
when it comes to dating, it's tough to tell the reasons im not into it. part of it is where i want to be when i start a relationship, in terms of both fitness and standard of living... im just not where i want to be to take care of someone else the way i'd like to. it also stems from me being extremely picky about the girls im attracted to (with looks AND personality) and my stubborness on not "settling" for less. also, as discussed in other threads, i live in los angeles and there isn't a more hostile environment with girls on the planet. they generally all have a wall up here and also enjoy stirring up drama with people they are close to and twisting their emotions into pretzels. so they are tough to get to know to begin with and then they take you on awkward rollercoaster rides when you finally do get close to them... i guess this just boils down to TMW for me....Too Much Work.
at some point, everything with girls kinda started to feel abstract to me. i know in my head that it's like riding a bike and natural, but i can't help but feel that i have a lot of catching up to do since i've been reclusive for so long and that bringing me up to speed would be a burden on someone else.
on a social non-romantic level, i feel like my life is busting at the seams.... like i don't get enough alone time to just relax in my apt. with my thoughts. i'm real tight with my friends and have an open door policy, so my place has become a revolving door of them coming over. so, i don't seek it out but i end up receiving plenty of attention and social interaction. i don't know, maybe i'd get lonely and go out more if i was left alone more, but it sure doesn't feel like it. i look forward to "don't-move-my-car" weekends where i know i'm not gonna have to go anywhere or see anyone.
all in all, i think i have a great life. i know things can always get better and i strive for that and to keep an open mind, but i definitely don't think being alone is the end of the world and im in no hurry whatsoever to change that part of my life.