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I think that Steve needs to step up and defend your friendship with him. Otherwise, and unfortunately, he's made his choice.
If my wife had told me that one of my friends couldn't be at our wedding because she didn't want him there, she'd better have had a DAMNED good reason.
In my opinion, YOU going to M* and approaching the situation isn't going to work...in fact, it will bolster her opinion of you for being so brazen. You're in a lose-lose situation, unless you somehow get Steve to step up for you.
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A government big enough to give you everything you want is big enough to take from you everything you have.
-Gerald R. Ford
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