First, please accept my apologies for not recognizing that you are a woman. So much for my great insight.
[quote]I'm hoping I did/said the right things. I also hope that she thought about the things I said. more than anything though, I hope she doesn't turn to her husband, because if she does, he's gonna turn everything I said upside down and it would've all been for nothing..[/quest]
Second, I think you handled the situation very well. Sadly, you sister is not willing at this time to take responsibility for her behavior. It really is up to you now to set the boundaries of your relationship with her as you see fit.
Good luck and happiness to you.