Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - Neighborhood kids - dispute - What do I do? (Apology-long post)

raeanna74 · 06-17-2006, 06:30 PM

Well we just spent a great day hanging out with the family who I was most anxious about. The mother who had yelled at me, sent a coloring book and note to my daughter thanking her for sharing her pool with the kids. It was very nice. So I went out last night and thanked her. We ended up talking and watching the kids play in the pool till nearly 9:00pm or so. Then the kids went inside to watch a movie and the dad of the other family went and got one of the 15 yr olds to come stay with the kids. Then the parents and hubby and I walked down to the bar 3 blocks away for the evening. We had a blast.
Then today we met at a lake outside of town for swimming. When we came home we all grilled out together and shared supper on our deck. Some more neighbors came over after supper and drank and talked for what seemed like hours. The kids that were outside (the two original offenders are still grounded) were getting along well.

I am beginning to wonder if my view of how groups of kids function together isn't a little warped. I grew up very sheltered. When I was in public school my parents were exceptionally strict and I stood out as being wierd, geeky, and a misfit. I never did get included in the group. I had one best friend for a couple years in school but then she started to get accepted by the rest of the kids and dumped me. I'm still bitter about that. My daughter seems relatively accepted so when they were excluding her I think I identified with that and it made me unreasonably angry. I was afraid that she'd become what I was and I hated it. In school the exclusion I suffered was never temporary. I didn't expect that the kids would ever include her again. Is my personal experience that unusual?? Are kids normally like this - not like my experience? I feel stupid asking this having been a teacher - but I've always taught in parochial schools and I think the atmosphere is a little different there. My parents homeschooled me from 7th grade on and I was glad for it because I hated how I was treated and that would never have changed. My parents were too insane for the kids to ever accept me.

06-17-2006, 06:30 PM	#19 (permalink)
raeanna74 I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot! Location: Upper Michigan	Well we just spent a great day hanging out with the family who I was most anxious about. The mother who had yelled at me, sent a coloring book and note to my daughter thanking her for sharing her pool with the kids. It was very nice. So I went out last night and thanked her. We ended up talking and watching the kids play in the pool till nearly 9:00pm or so. Then the kids went inside to watch a movie and the dad of the other family went and got one of the 15 yr olds to come stay with the kids. Then the parents and hubby and I walked down to the bar 3 blocks away for the evening. We had a blast. Then today we met at a lake outside of town for swimming. When we came home we all grilled out together and shared supper on our deck. Some more neighbors came over after supper and drank and talked for what seemed like hours. The kids that were outside (the two original offenders are still grounded) were getting along well. I am beginning to wonder if my view of how groups of kids function together isn't a little warped. I grew up very sheltered. When I was in public school my parents were exceptionally strict and I stood out as being wierd, geeky, and a misfit. I never did get included in the group. I had one best friend for a couple years in school but then she started to get accepted by the rest of the kids and dumped me. I'm still bitter about that. My daughter seems relatively accepted so when they were excluding her I think I identified with that and it made me unreasonably angry. I was afraid that she'd become what I was and I hated it. In school the exclusion I suffered was never temporary. I didn't expect that the kids would ever include her again. Is my personal experience that unusual?? Are kids normally like this - not like my experience? I feel stupid asking this having been a teacher - but I've always taught in parochial schools and I think the atmosphere is a little different there. My parents homeschooled me from 7th grade on and I was glad for it because I hated how I was treated and that would never have changed. My parents were too insane for the kids to ever accept me. __________________ "Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama My Karma just ran over your Dogma.