This all sounds strange to me. No intention to offend but to spend 5 years with someone you have spent a total of 2 weeks with physically, is just nuts. I'm not saying this from lack of experience, believe me. I did that for a year with a now ex-boyfriend, and just that was hard enough. And we made sure we saw each other fairly regularly. How well can you know him? I know you've communicated a lot but you have had no real-time input. I wouldn't be surprised if you met him and had no idea how to feel about the situation. How committed areyou guys to each other than you can go for 4 years without seeing each other personally?
What I just said has to affect my opinion on this so called "affair". It wasn't an affair. You were attracted. You tested the water, so to speak - you had relatively intimate conversation with the other guy knowing there was a mutual attraction. But you didn't do anything wrong. You moved away from this other guy and that's that. And then you were so honest you told your long-distance boyfriend (who you've only spent two actual weeks with and thinks that entitles him to some very deep form of committment - granted he did wait 5 years, as did you).
Quote:
|
As for leaving him, as it was advised by some of u, I don't think it makes sense in that issues and grievances would still be prepared in any other relationship. As for the 5 yr waiting, I wanted to wait because I loved him and still do. It is just that a certain point, unsure of myself and unsure of several aspects of my life, I questioned whether he was the One for me. And whether he indeed wanted me.
|
First, every relationship is different. Any other relationship could have similar problems, but never the exact same ones. You could have a lot less problems, and a lot more fun - presencially. Don't ever give up on looking for what feels right for you, just because you think that's all you're going to get and it doesn't change from relationship to relationship. If you're not sure, then it's probably not right - either that or you don't know what you want, or need.
I'm not sure why you've waited so long and if he's really worth that much of your time, to WAIT that way for so long. How much can you really know if you love someone if you've only had so little time with them in reality? Perhaps it's the idea and the memory that you love. Also, who could blame you for letting your eye stray when you've been alone for so long? It hardly seems fair. You're SO young. Also, you're doubting whether he really wants you? Well if he really has waited for 5 years (and not cheated on YOU, have you thought of that?) then he should do right?
Well, good luck with your current situation. We'd love to know how your meeting goes...