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I think that in most relationships, the two people involved don't always want the same things at any given moment. I think though that you have to have your eyes open and know where the fine line is between "I want to spend time with him/her right now but they don't want to spend as much time with me but sometimes it's the other way round" to "I want to spend time with him/her a lot more in general than they want to spend time with me and maybe that says something about where we stand". Sometimes it should be an issue. It has to do with context, and where the relationship is at that moment. Sometimes at a particular moment your priorities aren't the same, but that's ok. If we all wanted the same things all the time, then we'd all be the same, but we're not.
I like my personal space, being a bit of an introvert, but also I know that if I love someone, that person becomes such a big part of my personal time that it almost seems natural to spend most of my free time with them, even if it's doing separate things in the same space, or at least to want to do that even if I can't. It's like they become a part of what is personal to me.
It doesn't cross my mind that I need my personal space and I want them to go away some of the time. When I'm with them it's great, when I'm not it's fine too. I agree that personal time/space should be available if it's wanted and not be something you have to negotiate with your partner. But if it's going to work out, it has to be mutual. The person I love is always in my thoughts somehow, even if I'm not with them. I'm not thinking, when we're together, "oh ok I really enjoy your company but for today I've had enough can you leave now?" , or when we're apart "I wish I could get away from him/her more often". That's not even a consideration. I think this is what Shani means.
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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.
Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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