|
There are so many variables here.
Do you discuss your ex when you are around your child? If you expess any negativity towards your ex in the hearing of your son then he will quite quickly pick up on that.
It is quite normal for a child of around 2 or 2 1/2 to go through another major separation anxiety stage. I have babysat several children from infancy and once they hit their twos they get clingy all over again and complain about mom leaving them. I think it's just another part of the terrible twos. They're developing their separate identity but yet it's frightening to them to realize they ARE actually separate from Mom.
As for looking for abuse - Look for bruises that are in the shape of a hand or fingers, on the backs, back of legs, or backs of arms. Multiple lines not small circles of bruises. Things that YOU as a mother wouldn't be able to attribute to a corner of a coffee table or something. What his reaction to a raised hand. Most kids won't flinch if you raise your hand quickly and yet don't bring it toward them. Kids who have been abused may flinch more easily.
Also ask your ex for a time when he is not in a hurry. Make an appointment to at least talk to him over the phone. You both need to communicate your routines for the sake of consistancy for your son. Not just to know what is happening with him in a nosy sort of way but to make sure that you both are in agreement in discipline and daily routine. Bedtimes, naptimes, mealtimes, and daily acitivities give a child a sense of security. If your ex and you are not following the same schedules than that can cause him more fear. Both of you need to work to make your schedules with him a little more similar. If your ex refuses to communicate that then you need to get someone to mediate that for you.
__________________
"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma. 
|