ChadB

I'm not sure I agree that it is selfish to want to make a better life for someone you realize you hurt. Show them you made a terrible mistake and then treat them as they should be treated.

She's caught in a bad situation. She was mentally ready to leave but didn't want to hurt our children by not only the divorce but moving from a house to an apartment, taking them away from all their friends in the neighborhood, and possibly a school change, going into full-time employment and a tighter budget for us both.

Now that I've woke up am trying to show her that if we can patch our relationship then nothing has to change and she can be happy. I've not only realized that I love her but I have completely changed my personality, lifestyle, and attitude not only to be whom she wants, but to be a better person in general. I certainly don't see anything selfish in that.

Could I be happy if she left and took up a new partner? Certainly not at first. Losing someone you love is one of the hardest things you can face in life. Eventually that could change but honestly introducing a new man into the lives of our children makes me quite nervous. Regardless of how well she may know him they are not his children and anything could happen.

Could I still be a strong, good, man if she leaves. Without a doubt because I would be secure in the fact that I did all I could.

I don't think there is anything selfish about a man trying to fix his mistakes and hold his family together.

It doesn't seem like many people are willing to makes changes and fight for love these days. It usually seems like people get bored with each other and divorce with little thought.