Hah, I'm a true local. (hell, my necks even currently red!!)
Thar ain't no water here
Yeah, I agree with the car statement, although if you live in a neighbourhood close to downtown, near a grocery store like I did, you can survive without one.. (I did for over a year)
The mountains here wold be to me one of the biggest draws. Calgary does have a scene, but you usually have to search it out, but it does exist.