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Originally Posted by JinnKai
I'm asking from the frame of my own mind - I consider myself an extremely mentally controlled person, and take a great deal of pride in it. However, many of the people I know and hear about exhibit an astonishing lack thereof and likewise don't see it as being an important trait.
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For some reason this reminds me of another thread. It sticks out because you were saying something about cussing all the time and not understanding what the big deal was...not understanding why everyone chose to be offended.
And then here you are saying you think you have great self-control. Much moreso than people you know and hear about.
To me, this is contradiction. Or, if not, then maybe a bit of tunnel-vision.
Where you see great self-control, others see something different entirely.
It is a matter of perspective, obviously. You seem to become defensive when things like this are pointed out, which - to me, anyway - shows a lack of self-control. But like I said, that is simply my perspective.
To answer your question: When I find myself making a concentrated effort to control what I say or do, it usually means someone has made me very angry, very happy or very sad. I usually catch myself before doing or saying something that I'll regret later.
I think it is important not to overreact on a regular basis, as it will have a great effect on how others feel toward you. It is possible to alienate people without even trying. Or, more accurately, by not trying hard enough to keep in check some of the things you want to say.