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Originally Posted by Cynthetiq
I'm going to add, that since you have not been assertive before (could be read as CONFRONTATIONAL) you will probably fee like a dick or an asshole afterwards. This is normal to some degree, because well, standing up for yourself and your rights, is selfish.
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Good call, Cyn. This is an issue I come up against quite a bit... I hate feeling like an asshole when I'm trying to stand up for myself, especially to people who aren't used to me taking control of the situation and being assertive. In the end, though, it comes down to a "good" kind of selfishness (which I believe does exist), where calling one's one comfort boundaries is necessary for mental sanity and stability, and in fact it's necessary for conducting healthier relationships in general.