Emotional Security related to Sex Drive...
I have a theory.
I was reading in another thread about how women tend to need to be emotionally secure in their relationship to have a healthy/strong/etc. sex drive (and/or enjoy the sex optimally), and I'd agree with that. And I was wondering why women are like that. Mulling this over while reading the "Psychology of Facials" thread, I had an idea:
Perhaps the reason women tend to be more/get more emotionally invested in sex is that, for physiological reasons, women are put in a position of ummm, dare I say, submission.
Don't go all crazy on me talking about sexually aggressive women, etc. I'm talking about how women basically are the ones *accepting* foreign matter (OK, fine. Penis!). Whether it's vaginally, orally, or anally, women are in a position where it would be very easy to be hurt during the act of sex. Therefore, women have to be very trusting of their partner, which requires/engenders a strong(er) trust bond. Which in turn triggers a deeper emotional response.
Now yeah, I know that a man has to be trusting too, esp. during oral (why do I want to giggle here?). But fellacio (sp?) doesn't seem to me to be perceived as a "man being vulnerable" act. A man's sexual role as a "poker" (yeah, I'm a professional) I think tends to always be perceived as aggressive and dominating, vs. the womanly receptive "pokee" role, regardless of the orifice.
In ancient Rome I think it was, male sexuality was always OK, as long as the male was "poking". He wasn't perceived as a homosexual, even if he was having sex with another man. However, the male "pokee" was considered the (weaker, feminine) homosexual, because he was receiving.
Anyways, obviously I'm not a psychology expert, but I would be interested in your thoughts.
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"Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath.
At night, the ice weasels come." -
Matt Groening
My goal? To fulfill my potential.
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