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Originally Posted by ngdawg
I have seen too many parents push their kids in certain directions, be it their girls into dance class, sons into sports
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Providing the opportunity to try new things if they want is important. and I agree that the kids should not be pushed in a direction that the parent wants.
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Originally Posted by ngdawg
I have always felt that life is a series of choices and their resultant consequences. Not allowing our kids to make choices, even at very early ages, stunts their mental growth. From the time they've known their colors or how food tastes, I've presented choices-red shirt or the green one. Mac and cheese or bologna. It's their brains, after all, that need to be expanded-just seems logical to start there to me.
That's not to say we don't have rules-how to behave, curfews, etc. But I've always been flexible. If there's no real reason to say no to a request, I don't. My parents were of the 'I said no because I can say no if I want to' thought-many of their declinations of my requests, like going to a concert with friends or staying out a little later on a summer night, had no reason. Hence, I snuck around a lot. Got caught a few times, but that didn't stop me from trying again.
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I have been criticized for giving my children too many choices. But I don't want them to be sneaking around my back, I want them to learn to make their own choices and deal with consequences.
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Originally Posted by ngdawg
In the sea of adolescent creatures, my kids are pretty cool and pretty unique. I used to say I got lucky having them as they are. Too many have pointed out luck had nothing to do with it. I tend to agree now.
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and I think your kids are lucky to have a mother like you.
Thanks, ngdawg. You helped me see other strengths that I do have.