Somehow, I think at the heart of your confusion, you want to ask your friend one question: "What's going on with you?" There's a lot he isn't telling you, like: what does he want in a relationship? Why is he your friend? And the big one: what's he getting out of your friendship? You're getting his comfort and support, and a gentle shove now and again to keep you making your own decisions. But what's he getting? Why's he there? These are things you need to know. When you do know, you may be less confused about how _you_ feel. You may wanting to date him unconsciously just to learn more about him.
He sounds like a great guy, but you've put him on a pedestal. And he's got flaws and issues, we all do. If you two are really close friends, you get to ask him these questions. If the answers don't enlighten you, well, then there's part of him he's either not willing to share or doesn't understand himself. At that point you would have to back off. But at least you gave it a big shot, which as I said, is perfectly acceptable, justifiable, and understandable.
|