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Originally Posted by ASU2003
If they can see that there is a problem, how far should the parent go to fixing it? Would you do something, like buy a nice car, schedule cosmetic surgery or tell your child they need gain/lose weight to be more successful and popular? Or is it all up to the kid to make the most with what they've got?
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It's up to the parent to help the child to make the most of what they have. It is absolutely not the parent's responsiblity to buy the child a car, to make them cooler, or to get them plastic surgery because they don't like their nose... that is not teaching a child what is important... That's teaching a kid to be materialistic... Would the parent also get the underage kid pot and alcohol to help them to be cool?
If you were a young teen, and your parents told you you needed to lose weight... .would you? That would tend to make the teen more rebellious. A person can only lose weight because they want to -- not because someone is telling them to... A parent can encourage by having healthy snacks in the house and having healthy dinners but that's as far as it can go.
My parents are the two most outgoing people I've ever come across. Lifes of the party... They can arrive anywhere, and not knowing a soul, within an hour, everyone will know who they are and like them.. My mother can get the life story out of anyone... and even at her age (she's 72 now) she'll have boys in their 20s and 30s flirting with her... I, on the other hand, am the biggest wallflower ever... is that my parent's fault? I'd say no-- my being shy and being a wallflower is just part of my personality - and my parents buying me a cool car, or cool clothes, wouldn't have changed that...
A person has to make the most of who they are and what they have, and they have to learn, the younger the better, that money doesn't solve problems, and having someone else buy you something doesn't fix the problem...