Reflex Reaction...But Was It Right?
The following situation happened to me earlier today. I have mixed feelings about they way I handled it and decided to see what others would have done in the same situation.
My wife and I took our two kids, our almost 2 y/o son and our 8 week old daughter, to the area department store to pick up a few items. Once we got into the store, we each grabbed a cart to put the kids in (they both won't fit in one cart at this store). I had my daughter in her travel seat and my wife was carrying our son. As I was loading our daughter into her cart, my son decided it would be a good idea to plant his feet on the seat of the cart was he was being seated and, in the process, scrape his back on metal part of the cart. He started to scream so while my wife tried to stand him back up. This was difficult as he had squeezed himself into the seat pressing both his back and shins on the metal parts of the cart and he got the back of his pants caught on the cart. I turned to help my wife and just as I got to the cart, I saw an unfamiliar hand reaching for the back of my son's pants. I knew this wasn't my wife's hand as she was at the front of the cart. Not knowing who this hand belonged to or it's intention, I slapped it away and unhooked the pants from the cart. It wasn't until after he was out and comforted that I realized what I did. I have no idea who this person was but I think it was a lady I saw talking nearby when we walked into the store. After I realized what I did, I felt bad for a while but then I started to change my mind.
I gave it some thought and came up with this...while not very polite, I think I was justified as it was my instincts protecting my son. My son was screaming in pain and I was reaching to handle the problem when a stranger, who did not ask if we needed help, have permission to touch my son or even announce their presence, reach to touch my son. On top of that, she reached for his backside which, because of the pulling on his pants and my wife attempting to lift him out, was exposing both his back and part of his butt.
If the roles were reversed, I would not have assisted unless I was either asked or the parents were yelling for help. I would never consider placing my hands on a stranger's kid unless there I was aware of an immediate, life threatening need. In this case, I would have stayed nearby and assisted if asked.
So, my questions are:
Was I justified in slapping away this strangers hand?
Would you have done the same or would you have let the stranger help?
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A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day. Calvin
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