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Your brother's wife obviously has a drinking problem. Some people get mellow when they drink and others get vicious. I recall years ago when Johnny Carson quit drinking and explained that he was one of those people that just get mean when they drink so he stopped altogether.
Your brother is probably always going to side with his wife so there is not much you can do there. Probably the best you can do is avoid them in the future and hope she and/or your brother wises up someday. When you do have to see them, I would refuse to argue with her since it is like throwing gasoline on the fire. There is also probably not much your parents can do so it is best to not put them in the middle except to explain your concerns as you already have.
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