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Wow, lots of great input already! Just thought I'd throw in my 2 cents, some of which echos what others have said :-)
How did you first get into it?
I had been bi-curious for many years. Whenever I watched pornos, alone or with my partner, it was always the girl-on-girl scenes that did it for me; the guy-on-girl stuff rarely turned me on. T and I talked about it; I wanted to experience sex with a girl and he really wanted to watch. So this summer, we decided to go find me a girlfriend. Turns out single ladies are harder to find than couples, though.
How did the SO respond initially?
He was very much for it; he knew this is something I wanted to experience for a long time, and our relationship is plenty strong enough so that neither of us feels threatened.
How long have you been doing it?
Nearly six months.
What are the benefits?
It's a real turn-on for him to see me with my girlfriend; and it's a real turn-on for me to see him with my girlfriend. She and I will sometimes just make out, other times we go down on each other, use a strap on, etc.
An unexpected benefit? Our sex life as a couple is even better now!
What kind of ground rules do you have?
T and I are in this lifestyle as a couple; we agree on everything beforehand (our groundrules have evolved over the past few months)
No intercourse (except with strap on with girlfriend)
When one is ready to go, play stops
How do you deal with the possibility of STDs?
Discussion and Communication!
There are different levels of swinging. Some couples engage in full intercourse with other couples (this was my first impression of what "swinging" means). I know one couple that engages in sex with other couples on a regular basis (like two or three different couples in a night). Although they swap partners, no intercourse occurs known as "soft swap." There are other levels, too.
On a more personal note . . .
My husband and I are in an exclusive relationship with a couple, M and J, we met during our second visit to a local swingers club. M and J had been looking for an exclusive friendship for six years but the couples they met wanted to move much too fast for their comfort. M and I were very attracted to each other from the moment we saw each other, and being brand new to this, I liked their idea of going slow; we invested time getting to know each other before getting really involved sexually. We still go to the club together every 2-3 weeks, and we'll dance with other women sometimes (the guys, T and J, don't dance), but when it's play time, we four stick together (so to speak). We may be open to inviting others to join us, but we would want to spend time getting to know them first. Over the past few months, M and I have become very close friends -- the very hot sex is actually secondary to the friendship (but it sure is lots o' fun!)
I think the most important advice I could give anyone considering the swinging lifestyle is to be clear on what you want and remember that communication between you and your partner is of the utmost importance.
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