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Usually if there's kids involved the ex-wife keeps it and gives it to her daughter. Most women I know have had it melted into a pendant or earrings for their daughters.
Asking for it back is like her asking for the toolset she gave you back, it's a gift, it's "hers", keep that in mind.
P.s. If you do get it back don't "recycle" it on the next love interest... I've seen guys do it before.. not cool.
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