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Rodney · 12-07-2005, 05:17 PM

My wife is an ordained minister, though without a church, and for a while she did quite a lot of weddings. She doesn't charge a lot (actually, she doesn't charge anything, but they usually volunteer something). For that reason, I've seen a lot of weddings that were put on by people who don't have a lot of money. And there are ways of doing it quite well.

* Use a public venue. Where I live, the city and county park systems have halls and venues and outdoor plazas that can be rented pretty cheaply. One couple got married in the rec room of someone's parents' trailer park. And there have been weddings on the beach, which is the ultimate cheap impressive wedding. State parks aren't bad, either.

* Get your friends involved to save money. One couple reserved an old schoolhouse at a public park (see above) for both the wedding and the reception. One group of friends arrived early to set up for the wedding. After the wedding and before the reception, everybody joined forces to clear away the chairs, bring out and set up the tables, and set them. Then they sat down. The way everybody worked together to make the wedding work for this obviously not-rich couple -- well, in its way it made for a more impressive wedding than all the caterers you could buy. Nobody got all touchy feely, but you could feel the love.

* Keep the food simple. What's wrong with an afternoon wedding with cake and punch and maybe a little champagne? Nothing wrong with friends helping you potluck it, either.

* Forget videography, unless you have an amateur friend who wants to do it. As far as cheap photos are concerned, the best scheme I ever saw involved buying a couple of dozen disposable cameras and passing them out among the guests. At the end of the reception you collect them, have them developed, and have enlargements made of the best. You can also have a party later and invite friends to come over and see _all_ of the pictures.

*Clothing. Some people get married in elaborate wedding dresses and rented tuxedos. Some people get married in sportcoats and nice dresses. I knew one couple who got married in clown suits. As long as the love is there, it doesn't matter.

* Entertainment. You can handle that.

I wouldn't go into debt for a wedding. A wedding is a symbol, but it shouldn't be a fantasy. I knew one preacher, not my wife, who walked out of his commitment to officiate at a wedding because it was too decadently luxurious -- tens of thousands of dollars for flowers, a wedding dress that cost more than most peoples' cars, and so on. A wedding is about love. Focus on that, not the fantasy, and you'll have as great a wedding as that couple in the old schoolhouse.

12-07-2005, 05:17 PM	#11 (permalink)
Rodney Observant Ruminant Location: Rich Wannabe Hippie Town	My wife is an ordained minister, though without a church, and for a while she did quite a lot of weddings. She doesn't charge a lot (actually, she doesn't charge anything, but they usually volunteer something). For that reason, I've seen a lot of weddings that were put on by people who don't have a lot of money. And there are ways of doing it quite well. * Use a public venue. Where I live, the city and county park systems have halls and venues and outdoor plazas that can be rented pretty cheaply. One couple got married in the rec room of someone's parents' trailer park. And there have been weddings on the beach, which is the ultimate cheap impressive wedding. State parks aren't bad, either. * Get your friends involved to save money. One couple reserved an old schoolhouse at a public park (see above) for both the wedding and the reception. One group of friends arrived early to set up for the wedding. After the wedding and before the reception, everybody joined forces to clear away the chairs, bring out and set up the tables, and set them. Then they sat down. The way everybody worked together to make the wedding work for this obviously not-rich couple -- well, in its way it made for a more impressive wedding than all the caterers you could buy. Nobody got all touchy feely, but you could feel the love. * Keep the food simple. What's wrong with an afternoon wedding with cake and punch and maybe a little champagne? Nothing wrong with friends helping you potluck it, either. * Forget videography, unless you have an amateur friend who wants to do it. As far as cheap photos are concerned, the best scheme I ever saw involved buying a couple of dozen disposable cameras and passing them out among the guests. At the end of the reception you collect them, have them developed, and have enlargements made of the best. You can also have a party later and invite friends to come over and see _all_ of the pictures. Clothing. Some people get married in elaborate wedding dresses and rented tuxedos. Some people get married in sportcoats and nice dresses. I knew one couple who got married in clown suits. As long as the love is there, it doesn't matter. Entertainment. You can handle that. I wouldn't go into debt for a wedding. A wedding is a symbol, but it shouldn't be a fantasy. I knew one preacher, not my wife, who walked out of his commitment to officiate at a wedding because it was too decadently luxurious -- tens of thousands of dollars for flowers, a wedding dress that cost more than most peoples' cars, and so on. A wedding is about love. Focus on that, not the fantasy, and you'll have as great a wedding as that couple in the old schoolhouse.