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Wow. That sucks.
Not every girl is horrible like this. I think. Though I've done nearly exactly the same thing to someone. S was my soulmate, still call him "myself". But the distance killed me. I was going to school, over-stressed. I misunderstood, thought he didn't want me moving to the same town. I broke up with him, but still told him I loved him. Just needed some time to do school and get my life in order. He thought since I still told him I loved him, we were still together. Valentine's day last year I got back together with a good guy friend that I had been kind of seeing before. Broke S's heart. He became a drunken fool, completely incapable of trusting anything I said. Tried to patch things up a few times, save the friendship. He had unreasonable demands that I couldn't meet. Anyway... it ended poorly. We're both pretty messed up over it. And I'm seeing the guy I cheated on S with still. Can't seem to shake the guy, and he's a good one. Don't particularly want to shake him. But there's always that voice in the back of my mind, what about your soulmate? What about S? Tried ditching the current guy over the summer, started seeing S again. It was a disturbing mess. S ended up raping me. He wanted us back together so badly. I know I drove him to that level of insanity, or whatever you want to call it. I know it's all my fault, but I have no idea how to fix things. In the meantime, I'm trying to develop some sort of normal life with school and friends. Spend a lot of time with the current guy, though I often hesitate to call him my boyfriend. He proposed on my birthday. The ring and everything. I handed it back to him and told him to ask again in 2 years. There's no way I can make this kind of a decision now. What are these men trying to do, I'm absorbed in hard-core Chemistry courses, applying to UC schools. I was with the current guy to avoid the commitment that S tried to dig out of me. Such a mess. Trying to find some sort of normalcy.
I guess I don't have any good advice to give. Just realize this guy is probably manipulating her, and with her family's full support of him chances are things aren't going to change anytime soon. You will find someone eventually that won't do this to you. Sounds like you need to start dating people that aren't a distance away. Someone nearby that you can see and enjoy seeing everyday. Someone you can spoil that you don't need to worry about keeping your eye on. Dunno. Don't know how to get over the heartbreak. S seems to be doing better these days, but I don't know for certain since he doesn't often speak to me, just when he is able. Wish I had some sort of good advice to share.
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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq
"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy
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