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Originally Posted by iblade
Wow thanks for the input. Unfortunately for me, it's against me.
Now let's clear up some points. First of all, I did not force her to anything.
Two weeks ago, we go on a weekend to 温泉 (onsen, japanese hot springs)together. We rent a car, everything is fine. Insider note, that I didn't know at the time and she told me recently: it's on that week end, when I mentioned my return to France, that she realized she loved me. From that point, she's been thinking about the break up.
Saturday, one week ago: we have one of our greatest dates ever. I slept at her place friday night, and we spent the day together. It was really nice.
Sunday night: she sends me a text saying: Let's be friends for the remaining time. I say WTF?
Monday night: I go to her place to talk. She explains longly her point of view. I think to myself: "Break ups are hard. But think about it. It's moderately hard for you now. But if it was later, it'd be more painful for her when you leave." I think, "Okay, take it on you and remain good friends". Before leaving, I tell her: "I will never forget you." She is my first after all.
Tuesday to thursday: I meet her in the morning (we live close by). I'm smiling, trying to be "A good friend" and all.
Thursday night: She texts me asking me if I want to talk about it, and come to her place, cause she doesn't feel good telling only her version of the story. So I go there, tell her how I feel, that from me it's not true passion, but that I love her very nuch, and that I want to spend the remaining time making her happy and being with her as a couple. I explained what I said above, my feelings, and she said that she did not feel "True love" towards me either, and said she also wanted to do so.
I was completely honest. And I did not force her. I don't see what I am doing wrong. Of course we have no future together. How about enjoying the time remaining? She said I gave her some of the happiest times of her life. I feel the same too. I just don't want to think: damn, we had one more month, it could have been so good.
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I have to jump in here. For one, nobody thinks you "forced" her into anything. But you are sending some crazy mixed signals. She wants to call it off because she doesn't want to get too close, which is sensible. And you also feel there's no real future past a month or so. But you still want some fun (a.k.a. someone to screw while you're still in Japan) so you don't want to break it off. So when she invites you over again, instead of respecting her initial wishes and letting the relationship end cleanly, you go over there and list the reasons why you can't be together, then in your words "started playing a seduction game". This is after you admitted you have no real passion for her. Now, you say she also said this, but was this before or after you told her. Because if it's after, I don't see many people after hearing someone doesn't feel any passion for them and they have no chance at a real relationship would then say they are passionately in love. It sounds like to me she was just trying to make you feel better and save some face. But again, instead of letting her go and start getting over you, you push the issue, probably giving her some hope. You claim you want to make her happy? Let it go, and break it off clean and totally instead of leading her on. Because now, she's probably thinking there's some way she can either convince you to stay, carry on a long distance relationship, or move back to France with you if she just makes you happy enough. Personally, I think you are being horribly selfish, cruel, and childish. But hey, if you can live with yourself, more power to you.