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Lemme see if I got this right:
You meet her. You're friends. She shows sexual interest. You take the bait (because usually that just means an invitation). You sleep together- but she's proved to herself she's in control and loses interest. Nothing happens, except you think there's potential for more between you two. Time passes.
You're still interested and offer to take her on this trip to cheer her up because of her problems (I don't know what these problems are, but if she's the kind of girl I think she is, it was a big dramafest that everyone knows about). She accepts your offer.
Now, this is just my interpretation, but this is why I don't think you should have anything to do with her. After accepting the invitation, she goes through some screwed up thought process- this would cost alot of money, why is he doing this for me, he must want me bad but just to get in my pants, why else would he spend money on me? what a prick, I don't really want to go anymore.
Personal opinion? This girl has issues. Low self-esteem knuckled with a sense of high value in attractiveness- she wants the validation guys give her by buying her gifts or showing interest but doesn't escalate because 1. Feels she's not worth it 2. She doesn't want to lose the control she has.
Now, you've acted the gentleman all evening. There's nothing logical for her to be angry about. She's lost control of the situation. So she makes up a problem and puts you on her bad side so that you'd have to make it up to her in some way. You see through it and just get pissed at her, throwing her out of your life. (way to go)
Time passes. She never did get control back. You have backbone, a spine. Hot. Maybe he's worth going after, after all. Times passes, small house party. She shows interest, and it's returned (sexual tension). And here you are.
My opinon: As soon as she gains control over your relationship, she'll lose interest. And she is going to TEST you, all the time. Not just big stuff, but subtle things like body language and (friendly) put downs. She thinks she's not good enough and too good for you at the same time. Not worth your time.
You could either:
a) act like a jerk, putting her down all the time while giving her tidbits of validation.
b) Act like a normal person, and get sucked into her cycle of attraction/rejection
c) Suck up and give her all the validation she can take.
d) Stop interacting with people that live off drama and validation.
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"Asking a bomb squad if an old bomb is still "real" is not the best thing to do if you want to save it." - denim
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