feeling guilty I think is normal for many people in relation to sex and sexual activities. It has to do with social pressure that stems from way back when it was considered wrong to make anything sexual public and also that you shouldn't have sex ever outside of marriage. Yes it has to do with the church. But it has evolved into a generalised feeling where sex is not a good thing unless you are doing it with your spouse, to make a baby, and are not enjoying it (God forbid!). I too have had to deal with this silly guilty feeling.
Porn may be degrading form a certain point of view, but that's not what it's made for. Porn is made for you to watch, abstracting yourself from everything except the people on the screen getting off and regardless if the enjoyment is real or not. It could be real. That's what they want you to think. And it could be you. It could be you enjoying anal with no pain and having sex with multiple partners. It's just fantasy. Porn is harmless if you just take it for what it is. People having sex so you can watch. Sex, that non public thing that you are getting to watch in every detail. What could be hotter than that if all we're taught is that you're not supposed to even walk around in your underwear, or even touch yourself "inappropriately"?
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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.
Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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