Well, I can't say it better than ngdawg, but I'll concur. Keep the lines of communication open with your boyfriends. Tell him what the feelings are behind your actions; he needs to know if the issues have something to do with him, or with things carried forward from your past. It'll help you to analyze this for yourself, help him cope _and_ help him figure out how to respond constructively.
You'll also earn his further admiration for being a self-aware person. Being a together and mature person is not about being free of problems; it's about being self-aware of those problems and dealing with them constructively.
I would agree with talking finding some professional help, or a professionally-led support group. It really helps to hear from, and compare notes with, other people who have the same problems.
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