Quote:
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Originally Posted by Mantus
With time passing more and more knowledge of one's partner gets replaces by superimposed concepts because no attempts are made to refresh it. The mind fills in the blanks with whatever it likes. The only solution is renewed communication.
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I think this "silence" happens very easily, usually proportionate to how long a couple has been together; in other words, one or the other, or both, start to take the relationship and the other person for granted. That's why I think communication EVERY DAY is so important, starting with the minor details of the day (which are very important) and building up to deeper-running feelings that someone has experienced in reaction to those details. I think that if one doesn't share those every-day feelings, the ups-and-downs, then something gets lost in the distance. Both partners need to sit down each day (or on the phone, or whatever) and ask "How was your day?" "How did you feel about _____?" and be specific in showing their curiousity about the other person's life, not making assumptions from before (like what Martian said; nice one!!)
My SO and I struggle a bit sometimes over this aspect of our communication, because he tends to not like to communicate about deeper stuff every day (like I do)
and also doesn't always like to ask or be asked specific questions... whereas I am the opposite! But the good thing is that we are always working on it. I think that for the majority of couples in the world, it really takes time and effort to develop that kind of communication. Just like with an active sex life, I think it takes work to make daily communication creative and purposeful, and not boring... and I think it can only get better with time, if both people are committed. At least, those are my thoughts.
...and I heartily believe that deep conversation is a GREAT turn-on, at least for me. Communication with words leads to communication with the body, and vice-versa!
