When I finally get to make the rules....
All stupid people will be relocated to uninhabited parts of Siberia or Greenland. If these areas become too full, there is always Antarctica...
Everyone over the age of 65 will be required to take a driving test every year. All other drivers will be required to take a driving test each time they renew their license.
All athletes, actors, musicians, and other highly overpaid people will take a drastic pay cut. Paycheck is based on talent and work ethic.
Excess funds from said pay cuts will go towards pay raises for teachers, policemen, firefighters, military personnel, and other such underpaid and underappreciated public service jobs.
All biting, stinging, ugly, and otherwise annoying insects will be relocated with the stupid people. The only exception will be honeybees, who will all be rounded up and taken care of by professional beekeepers.
Any "music" that sounds as if the singer swallowed the microphone and began making guttaral noises will be banned from the airwaves. Also, Avril Levigne, the Simpson sisters, and Hilary Duff will be banned from the airwaves.
Bad Mexican restaurants are outlawed.
There really will be a separation of Church and state.
All stupid Utah liquor laws will be repealed immediately.
Humvees and other too large SUVs will be outlawed. If you need more than one parking space to park your vehicle, you don't need to be driving.
Birth control and sterilization will be free to anyone who wants them.
Bell peppers, sauerkraut, and lima beans will be banned.
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"They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings; steal a little and they throw you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king"
Formerly Medusa
Last edited by Grasshopper Green; 10-20-2005 at 05:03 PM..
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