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I've seen this issue so much in the past few years just through my own friends.
My wife and I were lucky in that we decided we wanted to start "thinking about having kids and just let things happen if they happen" and within in 6 months of being off birth control, pop, she's pregnant. We waited a year and a half and realized we would love to have another child. Same thing, off the bc, then pop, another kid no problem.
I don't say all of that to be insensitive... so let me move on.
During all of that time, we had other friends who started trying to get pregnant around the same time my wife was pregnant with our first child. It took them more than a year and of course during that time, they started moving toward that whole fearful zone of "do we need to look into other methods yet" attitude.
I had another friend who started trying sometime after my first child, and is still trying now 3 years later. She's spent the last year or more doing fertility and has now decided to go with invitro (sp?).
We have another set of friends who were pregnant, the wife miscarried, bled out and nearly died on the table at the hospital and they had to remove her cervix. They adopted a beautiful little girl and got her from just after birth. Then, 2 years later, they adopted a baby boy and even got to be in the hospital at birth and they were checked into the hospital just as if they had had the baby. They brought the boy straight to them, and they went through everything new parents do during those first few hours even. Of course, the recovery was easier, but the rest pretty much was just like having your own kid. Watching the two of them now with their two children is such an amazing testimony for adoption to me. In fact, the two of them have been an inspiration to ....
Another couple we know who have been "trying" for years now and have gone through the fertilizations to no avail. Instead of taking the risk of the more serious (and costly) procedures, they have decided to go forward with adopting.
Bad Jane did a very good job with expressing the honest feelings of frustration and true emotion behind the decision I think. I believe you and your wife obviously have the desire to have a biological offspring and I think that is perfectly normal. Go for it. Adoption also has it wonderful rewards too and can be something that you can still do in the future should you choose to do so. It can also be expensive as well depending on what adoption path you choose, but the rewards are well worth it from every experience I've seen.
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I think that's what they mean by "nickels a day can feed a child." I thought, "How could food be so cheap over there?" It's not, they just eat nickels. - (supposedly) Peter Nguyen, internet hero
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