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I read it & I'm glad I did. (paragraphs would help though).
twisted, as i see it- You've been through a lot, have been dealt a lot of shitty cards, and been around some really shitty people. But, you've also described several great talents, as well as some hope for the future, which is more than a lot of people have.
You really need to hang around some quality people though, it would change your opinion a wee bit.
Luck and love,
mr sticky
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The sad thing is... as you get older you come to realize that you don't so much pilot your life, as you just try to hold on, in a screaming, defiant ball of white-knuckle anxious fury 
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