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I wrote this for the Magazine several months ago.......but it seems pertinent
Realationships
There is a saying, all good things come to those who wait. Experience has shown this to be a wonderful example of wisdom passed down through time. In youth we all find the sexual aspect of “hooking Up,” to be the pinnacle of relations, then reality bites off a chunk of our collective asses. Shortly after our partner does the same.
There are way too many stories of the wake up call to what actually thinking about relationships entails. Some people never actually decide to take it seriously…what a pity. The value of attempting to understand, and live with someone is incredible. And the payoff that comes from the commitment, as well as the compromise cannot be overly stated. Few things in this life offer the opportunity to better ourselves, and manage to give back such a huge benefit.
I am not simply referring to the sexual payment of a love relationship, as that is but one aspect of what we can experience. As an example, How many people here on the Tilted Forums have you had the Joy of Sexing? Probably not many. Yet it is likely there are quite a few you have come to appreciate for advice, humor, interaction, or just to shoot the shit. These are excellent relationships to explore, as they carry no serious obligation in this world of wooden tables and comfy chairs. We all seem to be a bit more open with ourselves due to these limited obligations, and I would think, a bit more of the actual “Us”.
Given the opportunity to spend time with someone, here or in the world outside, is the key to starting any relationship. Having the chance to watch someone, spy on them if you will, before actually saying hello is just damn sweet. Think of how many broken hearts would be avoided if this were available in the physical realm. There are some who you see on the boards, and know to avoid. There are others that may draw you in, connect with you in some way. And so a relationship begins.
In this realm of unseen faces, it is far too easy to accept the projection of another. I have found the Avatar says much about the person behind the nickname, often more than a profile can hope to do. The avatar seems a definition of who we want to be seen as and sometimes who we really are. My job is to watch others and make many judgments based on who I think they are, as with personal relationships this is never easy. I have learned much about many people here by doing this Virtual People Watching, and have grown to feel emotional about quite a few. Truly it makes for a dynamic, and more complete life to do so.
Rare though it may be, we have created a beautiful thing here. The community is healthy, the membership diverse, and freedoms abound. If only such a place existed as more than digital data, though I suppose it really does, in the minds and hearts of us all.
tecoyah
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Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Buddha
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