I want to tell you that you'll always be beautiful to us, but I know that won't help
In addition to the arnica, you might want to check out something like mederma or a similar scar prevention cream. It WILL get better - it always looks most awful in the few weeks after the surgery. You (or your doctor, rather) have essentially done violence to the tissue and it takes a while to recover from the insult. I thought the laparoscopy scar over my pube line would never heal and would always be a big, lumpy scabby line and I'd never be able to wear a swimsuit again. For the first year, it was a little noticeable but now (3-4 years later) it's practically invisible. And if it doesn't heal the way you want, I can't imagine that any reasonable person would begrudge you a little plastic surgery
As for the emotionality, honey we've all been there. Cry all you want and don't feel stupid about it. I bawled at the end of Moulin Rouge not so long ago. My mother-in-law cries at Kodak commercials. I nearly lost it in Target a few weeks ago when I was having my own self-image problems and saw this beautiful lingerie that I know I will never fill out. Pathetic, but hey, we've all been there and there's nothing wrong with it. You're just reacting to an abnormally traumatic event in a totally normal way.
Remember we're all here for you.