abaya

Heh, well they ask for sex, don't they? Yeah, this is an age-old question. Why do most women prefer to live in neat and tidy places, while most men are content to live in a trash heap? (Again, I'm not saying ALL are like this, but I've yet to know any man who give a damn.) I can't sort it out myself, and I sort out human behavior as a living (I'm an anthropologist).

Well, these things become a woman's (or man's)domain only when one lets that happen, I think. For me, I refuse to do more than half of the work, period. Ktspktsp is well aware of my stubborness on equality in the household (and I think he agrees with me on principle, but that doesn't always translate into reality), so we try to communicate about that. It's somewhat easy when we're not living together, but both of us are going to have to make serious adjustment when we live together again.

I think it's cool, lurkette, that ratbastid finally came around and 'fessed up about his sheer laziness. That takes some balls for a man (or woman) to do that, and then to work on changing it. As for lessening expectations, I'm curious about what you mean? You let the house be a little more messy, or you just started reminding him more often?

And how do you make your "reminders" not sound like nagging (to him)? I can't figure out what is a nice way of reminding someone to do a chore without putting them on the defensive...

__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran