Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - 24 hours from now my divorce is final.......

pan6467 · 08-17-2005, 04:32 AM

Kind of bumming, kind of relieved, very dark humored and cynical today. Can't sleep.... don't want to eat..... for the first time in my life I am truly facing the finality of something and it SUCKS.

It's not like the finality of high school where you know you are going on to something better or have out grown the situation, and you won't ever see those friends again, and so on and so forth......

Actually..... it is exactly like that..... in the year we've been seperated and even of late I have always held some form of hope (even tho I am not in love with her (I do love her tho)). I think I wanted it to work because I didn't want to be alone....... I missed the companionship and the being a couple.....

I will say she was the only woman I have met so far in my life that truly understood me..... well at first.... but by the time she left, we had built so may walls and distanced ourselves so much I don't think we knew each other (or even who we had become).....

08-17-2005, 04:32 AM	#1 (permalink)
pan6467 Lennonite Priest Location: Mansfield, Ohio USA	24 hours from now my divorce is final....... Kind of bumming, kind of relieved, very dark humored and cynical today. Can't sleep.... don't want to eat..... for the first time in my life I am truly facing the finality of something and it SUCKS. It's not like the finality of high school where you know you are going on to something better or have out grown the situation, and you won't ever see those friends again, and so on and so forth...... Actually..... it is exactly like that..... in the year we've been seperated and even of late I have always held some form of hope (even tho I am not in love with her (I do love her tho)). I think I wanted it to work because I didn't want to be alone....... I missed the companionship and the being a couple..... I will say she was the only woman I have met so far in my life that truly understood me..... well at first.... but by the time she left, we had built so may walls and distanced ourselves so much I don't think we knew each other (or even who we had become)..... __________________ I just love people who use the excuse "I use/do this because I LOVE the feeling/joy/happiness it brings me" and expect you to be ok with that as you watch them destroy their life blindly following. My response is, "I like to put forks in an eletrical socket, just LOVE that feeling, can't ever get enough of it, so will you let me put this copper fork in that electric socket?"