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I've come to realize that in relationships, relying on your gut feeling and being honest are really the only viable, plausible, effective methods. That said, in this situation, your gut feeling is dead on. She's acting like a spoiled girl who reacts violently and overtly when challenged. Some people back down when they're challenged, some attempt to compromise, and some act out their shame in anger or otherwise irrational emotions. I'd tend to believe that she feels bad for not calling you, and rather than apologizing -- she made it your fault. I've known a few people like this, some members of my own family, and it's rather bothersome. Letting them "have their space" generally never worked either, because they do not feel remorse -- they believe their anger/outburst was justified. (They think YOU should come apologize).
Usually, I'd just chalk it up to experience and walk away, and thats what I'd personally recommend you do. You acted like a mature, caring, responsible adult, and she acted like an immature, uncaring, and irresponsible "girl". You let her have her time, and her space. You gave her days, and you even went by to check on HER health and safety (a rather altruistic deed). She left you on your birthday with no ride home, didn't communicate with you for days, and then got ANGRY when you went to see if she was alright. Common sense makes this blantly obvious. You were right, she was wrong. If she wants to come apologize, fine.. but don't expect it or ask for it -- you'll get another overtly angry response.
If in a week or so you still have "tender feelings" for her, call her up and ask how her life is. How's school? How are you? How's life.. don't ask for an apology, dont apologize -- just converse. If she's as immature as I'd tend to believe from your story, she won't have gotten over your percieved "bad behavior" and will still be resentful/angry. If she's incapable of being mature on even that level, then I don't think she's worth having a mature relationship with, Ramallah.
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