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Originally Posted by amonkie
Rammallah - it sounds like you feel like a hurt boyfriend... yet you guys were not back together? Honestly, when stressful things come up, normal courtesy responses most often go out the window. While you may be sincere in your worry for her, it is apparent you two are not on the same page about an appropriate level of communication and accountability towards the other. To me, it seems like you have been put back on the Friend burner, and she has chosen to focus her attention with other people during this time.
My reccomendation would be to give her space - you've let her know you're concerned, and the ball is now in her court. If she wants to involve you, she will contact you. If she does not, you need to go on and not sit around waiting for something that she is obviously not interested in at the moment.
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Maybe some background info would make things more clear. Shortly before we broke up, I decided that I needed to have an important conversation with her. I had given it a lot of thought and I truly believed that it was for the best that we have this conversation. When we first started talking, we agreed that neither of us wanted anything serious. A few months after we had been going out, I still felt the same way and I was beginning to feel that things were getting more serious. I decided to tell her how I felt and that I hoped she still felt the same way too. She interpreted it in a very different way. I was just saying that I was scared of something serious because I'm in my early 20s, and settling down is scary to me; she took it as me saying that I thought she wasn't good enough for a serious relationship. Things got rocky between us after that; she started to withdraw out of fear of being hurt. We broke up soon after and later she told me how much it hurt her when we had that conversation. I explained to her that I can understand how she felt but that she took it the wrong way and that I didn't mean that she wasn't good enough. Soon after, I realized that I had made a mistake by telling her that I didn't want anything serious. And ever since then, I've been trying to convince her that I really do want to be with her. I do believe that she still loves me and wants to be with me because she tells me so. When she gets a day off of work, she wants to spend it with me, and she did throw a surprise birthday party for me. She was going to sleep at my house the night of my birthday and hinted that she had a "surprise" for me that night. If she only considers me a "friend" right now, then I'm a pretty close friend.
I am giving her space right now. She called me a little while ago and said that she was going to her parents' house. I asked her how she was doing and she said that she didn't feel like talking about it, so I told her to call me when she felt like talking, and I'm not going to try to get in touch with her until then.