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stevie667 · 07-30-2005, 05:10 PM

Twatted [Synonyms: Pissed, Drunk, Armsed]
[Pronunciation guide: Twa-tid]

Twated is a similar experience to being ‘fucked’, except caused by alcohol (as found in ‘booze’ and ‘vodka’). After copious consumption of alcohol, affecting individual will tend to act much like a ‘gimp’, with delusions that they are the alpha male of their pride lands, and that all females belong to them. Any non-twatted person will realise this is complete bull-shit, and try to avoid them at all costs.

Physiologically, being twatted differs from being ‘fucked’ in that a severe loss of motor control occurs, along with a general decrease in inhibitions. This is good for sub-dominant males when a female is extremely twatted, as chances of ‘mating’ increase dramatically. Clever males are known to pair two twatted females together, and record the consequences. These males should be bought more ‘booze’ or ‘vodka’ (or perhaps a combination of the two, depending on budgetary constraints) so as to obtain the video tapes while they try to ‘mate’ with the afore mentioned females.
When a male is twatted, his chances of ‘mating’ are dramatically reduced, along with blood flow to brain and genetalia. No-one is particularly sure where all this blood goes, but it is speculated that it pops out for a cup of tea with the blood of other similarly bollocksed pack members.

Munchies are highly prevalent when twatted, as they are when ‘fucked’, but the food choices are generally much poorer, such as kebabs, and can be fought over by males. Fortunately for ‘fucked’ people, the intelligence quote of twated people drops dramatically after drinking, and as such their foods can be kept safe by merely throwing a small spherical object into the path of an approaching car and saying “fetch” in a loud clear voice. If this fails, the guard elephants should be a nice surprise.

For more information on particular effects of alcohol, see ‘booze’ and ‘vodka’.

07-30-2005, 05:10 PM	#22 (permalink)
stevie667 Too Awesome for Aardvarks Location: Angloland	Twatted [Synonyms: Pissed, Drunk, Armsed] [Pronunciation guide: Twa-tid] Twated is a similar experience to being ‘fucked’, except caused by alcohol (as found in ‘booze’ and ‘vodka’). After copious consumption of alcohol, affecting individual will tend to act much like a ‘gimp’, with delusions that they are the alpha male of their pride lands, and that all females belong to them. Any non-twatted person will realise this is complete bull-shit, and try to avoid them at all costs. Physiologically, being twatted differs from being ‘fucked’ in that a severe loss of motor control occurs, along with a general decrease in inhibitions. This is good for sub-dominant males when a female is extremely twatted, as chances of ‘mating’ increase dramatically. Clever males are known to pair two twatted females together, and record the consequences. These males should be bought more ‘booze’ or ‘vodka’ (or perhaps a combination of the two, depending on budgetary constraints) so as to obtain the video tapes while they try to ‘mate’ with the afore mentioned females. When a male is twatted, his chances of ‘mating’ are dramatically reduced, along with blood flow to brain and genetalia. No-one is particularly sure where all this blood goes, but it is speculated that it pops out for a cup of tea with the blood of other similarly bollocksed pack members. Munchies are highly prevalent when twatted, as they are when ‘fucked’, but the food choices are generally much poorer, such as kebabs, and can be fought over by males. Fortunately for ‘fucked’ people, the intelligence quote of twated people drops dramatically after drinking, and as such their foods can be kept safe by merely throwing a small spherical object into the path of an approaching car and saying “fetch” in a loud clear voice. If this fails, the guard elephants should be a nice surprise. For more information on particular effects of alcohol, see ‘booze’ and ‘vodka’. __________________ Office hours have changed. Please call during office hours for more information.